Clergy partnerships, in line with other partnerships, do, sadly, encounter periods of difficulty and may break down. These situations are never easy for anyone, but for clergy partnerships there may be additional pressures resulting from other people’s expectations and projections, and a particularly acute sense of failure, guilt and shame. The breakdown of a clergy partnership may impact not only the couple and their family and friends but also the worshipping and wider community. It can also have implications for ministry roles and housing. Clergy partnerships and family life are often more public than in other spheres of life, and boundaries between personal and professional can often be blurred. Some partners of clergy see themselves, and are seen by others, as an integral part of the ministry offered by their partner. This role is often not formally acknowledged or renumerated.
In recognition of this, the Church of England has support networks in place to assist clergy, their partners and their families when relationships come under strain or break down. Chief amongst these is the role of Bishops’ Visitors.
How Bishops’ Visitors can help
Bishops’ Visitors act on behalf of the Diocesan Bishop in cases where a clergy partner may need advice, practical help and emergency financial provision because the couple are contemplating separation or have made the decision to separate. As a couple, you may not have made a decision to separate but for various reasons you have been considering it and may be unsure of what would happen regarding such things as finances, children, where would you live etc. In such cases, a confidential conversation with a Bishops’ Visitor may help.
Bishops’ Visitors are usually the first port of call in such a crisis. Bishops’ Visitors are appointed by the Bishop; they do not offer marriage guidance or counselling but offer an understanding and compassionate listening ear. Bishops’ Visitors are selected for their skill and experience; they can signpost and support you to access sources of support, and always maintain strict confidentiality. If you feel you would value this kind of support, for which there is no charge, please contact directly one of the Bishops’ Visitors listed below. Please be aware that the Bishops’ Visitors work as a team and support one another in their work. They also work closely with diocesan, archidiaconal and Bishops’ House colleagues to ensure that you get the help that you need. In such collaborative working, they will only disclose your identity if you give permission for them to do so, unless there are immediate safeguarding concerns.
You are, of course, also able to contact the Bishops or the Archdeacons directly if you prefer to have a conversation with them.
Our Bishops' Visitors - Please Email bishopsvisitors@chester.anglican.org
Peter Hall
I grew up in small village/suburb of Grimsby in Lincolnshire but have lived in Cheshire for the past forty years. I am married to Elaine, who was ordained in 1997 at St George’s where she is now the Vicar. I have been a Reader in the Church of England since 2003 and a Bishop’s Visitor since 2006. I am also the National Secretary for Bishop’s Visitors, a role I have had since 2007. Having lived in several parishes I am very aware of the pressures of family life in the Vicarage.
I am a keen walker who has completed the Pennine Way on three occasions.
Tina Lightfoot
My name is Tina Lightfoot. Having retired from the NHS after a long career specialising in the care of patients with cancer and other similar life changing conditions, I was called to ordained ministry and was subsequently ordained in the summer of 2022.
I have been married for 46 years and have 2 adult sons and 3 grandchildren.
Susie Mansfield
My name is Susie Mansfield, I have recently retired after 40 years working part time as a Physiotherapist in the NHS. My husband also retired from full time ordained ministry in Chester diocese last year, having served in several posts over 34 years . We have 3 grown up children , all of whom grew up in a vicarage setting, and three young grandchildren.
David Brewster
Originally from Yorkshire, I’ve lived in the diocese since I was ordained in 1999. For nearly 20 years I served in Stockport and then in 2022 I moved to Foxhill as Chaplain working alongside my wife Lucy (also ordained) who is the director. We have three grown up children. Having lived in a vicarage for decades, I’m passionate about the well-being of clergy and their families.